I can tuck mytits in my pants
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
