I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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