you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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