I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize