I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
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