I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
