I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
