I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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