At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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