Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
