Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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