My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
True strength comes from lack of pants
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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