Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
