? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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