Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
