I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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