Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
