I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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