New low: just hacked my moms facebook
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i dont even know how to be here
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
