Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
