their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
