Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
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