OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
