I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Randomize
