you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
We got so high we made milksteak
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
why is half of my head shaved?
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