Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Randomize
