She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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