btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
my shit smells like andre
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize