You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize
