Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Randomize
