what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
