You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
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