When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
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