TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize