I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize