TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
