is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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