READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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