Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
