remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
