Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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