Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
