garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
