Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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