Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
