P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
