K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
