1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
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