Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
