The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I hate all girls vehemently.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Randomize
