Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
When did angry sex become our thing?
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
