my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
