I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
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